This was sent in by my brother Dan.
The 2011 Darwin Awards are out!! Yes, it's that magical time of year
> again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved
> among us.
>
> Here is the glorious winner:
>
> 1. When his 38 caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim
> during a hold-up in Long Beach , California , would-be robber James
> Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the
> barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
>
> And now, the honorable mentions:
>
> 2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting
> machine and after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his
> insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its
> men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a
> finger. The chef's claim was approved.
>
> 3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car
> during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman
> had taken the space.. Understandably, he shot her.
>
> 4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver
> found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting
> from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his
> incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone
> waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the
> mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very
> excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies.. The deception wasn't
> discovered for 3 days.
>
> 5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious
> head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received
> the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how
> close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.
>
> 6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the
> counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer,
> the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which
> the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and
> fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he
> got from the drawer... $15. [If someone points a gun at you and gives
> you money, is a crime committed?]
>
> 7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly.. He decided
> that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab
> some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over
> his head at the window. The cinder block bounced back and hit the
> would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store
> window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape...
>
> 8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man
> grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the
> woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher.
> Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher.. They put him in
> the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of
> the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied,
> "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."
>
> 9.. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a
> Burger King in Ypsilanti , Michigan at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and
> demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't
> open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion
> rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast... The man,
> frustrated, walked away. [*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]
>
> 10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on
> a Seattle street by sucking on a hose, he got much more than he
> bargained for.. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man
> curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman
> said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline, but he plugged
> his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner
> of the vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best
> laugh he'd ever had.
>
> In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with friends
> and family....unless of course one of these individuals by chance is a
> distant relative or long lost friend. In that case, be glad they are
> distant and hope they remain lost.
>
> *** Remember.... They walk among us, they can reproduce, and they
> vote!!!!! No virus found in this message.
